10 Phrases That Destroy A Relationship
You need to bite your tongue today.
Words that we sometimes tell a loved one in the height of a quarrel or due to tiredness can be hurtful, make a relationship extremely stressful and unbearable, and even cause a break-up. We would like to bring to your attention 10 phrases that you should never say to your loved one. Thus, you need to bite your tongue today so as not to kick yourself tomorrow.
Phrases that violate the feelings of a partner
When you speak phrases like “That's no big deal!”, “Don’t be so tragical about it!”, “How much can you fret about it?” you do not solace and give support to your partner as it might seem to you, but devalue his feelings. A close person is unlikely to reveal his heart to you if you reject his feelings or consider them ridiculous. He will feel resentment and loneliness, and it will spoil your relationships. Instead of it, you should try to recognize what caused such feelings in your partner.
If one of the lovers has tired of the other and lost interest in him, then the loving couple is on the path to a break-up. So, do not throw the words that express unconcern. It’s better to consider what you really feel and discuss it with your significant other.
You should never check your loved one against other husbands (wives) if the contrast is not in his favor. Instead of make an example of someone, try to fixate on the positive – on all the good things and emotions that your loved one brings into your everyday life. It is one of the best tips if you want to find a girl for marriage.
Phrases that contain generalizations
Avoid statements that include generalizations “always”, “never”, “constantly”, and so on. Using such phrases, you place the blame on your loved one for the problems of the past, today, and future. It is more effective to focus on the present moment and look for a solution to a problem together with your loved one, as well as discuss your feelings and abandon blaming. It helps your partner to understand you better.
Phrases that hurt the dignity of a partner
All people want appreciation and gratitude, and statements that hurt the sense of self-worth are painful for every person. If you use the phrases like “No one but me can love you with such a figure”, “Don't be such a smarty pants!”, “Who else will need you?”, then in the end, your significant other will leave you for another person who loves, appreciates, and really admires him.
Phrases containing threats to leave a partner
“I want to break-up,” “I want to leave you,” “I’m going back to mother,” – in case you do not have a clear intention to divorce or break-up with a loved one, never say such phrases. And generally, do not throw any statements that contradict your true desires and feelings. Firstly, this is a kind of manipulation oriented to achieve something from a partner. And secondly, such phrases destroy a relationship and can lead to unintended consequences that you are not ready for.
Phrases expressing sorrowing that you have met each other
Very few words can be compared to the phrase “I wish we never met each other!” in its destructive power. Such a statement means that your loved one is guilty of all the awful things that have happened with you after you met him. Therefore, do not use such offensive phrases. You should better consider: what is your personal contribution to the relationship where there is no harmony and joy? What is your share of responsibility for what is happening in your relations?
Unlike constructive criticism aimed at improving the situation and relationships with a partner, the phrases like “It’s you who’s to blame for everything”, “It’s because of you we always squabble”, “But for you, we wouldn’t be late,” make a person feel guilty. Their main goal of such words is not to fix a problem, but to manipulate the partner.
Phrases like "Mind your own business"
If you tell your partner: “That's got nothing to do with you!” “Mind your own concerns!” “Since when must I be accountable to you?” you make it clear that you do not respect him or think it unnecessary to be honest with him. Thus, you undermine the basis of your relationships.
Words indicating the unwillingness to talk
When one of the partners shields himself from a loved one with a wall of silence, it is even more dangerous for a relationship than any statements. Actually, it is a kind of “disconnect” in a couple. Consequently, lovers do not understand each other and cannot find ways to fix the existing problems. The only way out is to discuss everything with each other. No matter how unpleasant or painful such a dialogue may be, it is better than keeping silence. In the end, it gives an opportunity to hear and understand each other.