How Have You Broken Your Own Heart?

There are various ways to get your old self back.

POSTED BY GUEST WRITER

We have all been heartbroken at least once in our life, but were we heartbroken because of our own selves or did someone else breaks our heart? It is hard to believe breaking your own heart is possible at first, but actually, it is a rather common thing most of us go through in life. Losing yourself to love someone else is never a good thing and it always ends with a broken heart one way or another. How does breaking your own heart feel and knowing how to prevent it is important if you want to be happy. If your heart is broken, there are various ways to get your old self back - for example, yoga for a broken heart seems to be a great choice!

What does a heartbreak mean to you?

Breaking your own heart does not always mean you keep on dating wrong people who make you feel miserable. Breaking your own heart can also be your way of clinging to an old love. Your old love experiences should always set the standards for your future relationships, but you should never look to compare your relationships through your old love experiences. You need to stop avoiding people because you are afraid they will make you lose yourself again, this is not how it works. You are the only one who has control over your own self, no one has the power to take you away from yourself unless you allow them to. Your old experiences should have taught you that it is not another person who changes you, it is you who allows them to do so. True love, a good partner will never try to change you and bend your personality to suit their tastes, they will love you for who you are and embrace all of what you have to offer as a person.

When was the first time you figured you are feeling like a shadowy version of yourself?

If you ever broke your own heart, you most certainly know how it feels to be a shadowy version of yourself. Being there with your body but your soul is nowhere near, lost and unaware of how to get it back. It is important for you to love yourself, to the fullest. You cannot expect anyone to love you for who you are if you continuously keep on putting up walls and preventing your soul from speaking out when it is needed. Be yourself and never allow anyone to treat you badly just because you are being yourself.

Were you ever afraid of not being able to get yourself back?

Once you get to feel like a shadowy version of yourself you will start fearing for your well being, you will start thinking your old self will never be back again. It is fine if you felt like this upon losing yourself to love the wrong person, however, there are things you must learn from it all and ensure you never put yourself in that position again.

How does your internal dialogue usually sound like?

If your internal dialogue usually sounds like a conversation filled with doubt and regrets, it is pretty obvious you yourself have broken your own heart. Try out local dating, try doing sports and meet new people, be yourself, quit wondering about the things you went through and quit comparing everyone to your ex. Your ex is an ex for a reason and that does not mean everyone else will be like your ex.

Did you confide in anyone and why?

If your answer is yes, that is really no surprise. We all have confided in someone and it was mainly because we thought they were our soul mates. It is nice to confide in a perfect person of your choosing, but there are things you need to keep under control. You cannot let anyone shape your future, wishes and desires to how they think are right. Relationships are two-sided and it is all about compromise. Without compromise, one of the sides will always end up heartbroken and will not get a chance to be who they really are.

What does true freedom mean to you?

When we are asked about freedom, we all usually give similar answers, but actually, we all think of freedom differently due to our past experiences. If you think freedom means being able to do all the things that make you happy that means your previous relationship most likely did not allow you to be yourself to the fullest. If you think freedom means being able to go out and party whenever it is possible, it is possible you are only lacking a bit of fun in your life. Freedom can be many different things life brings to us, but it is on us to decide which type of freedom we need in our life.

If you had a chance to meet a younger version of yourself, what three steps would you follow in order to prevent breaking your own heart?

Most of us would truly love to get a chance and talk to the younger versions of our own selves. As we get older, we go through many different things in life, which means if we had a chance to speak to younger versions of ourselves, we would be able to give them advice and important steps to ensure they never end up as heartbroken as we have at first. Here are three steps/pieces of advice that most of us would end up giving out.

1. You will break your own heart by not loving yourself first.

2. You will break your own heart by not being clear about what you want.

3. You will break your own heart by caring for someone who does not care about you equally.

If our younger versions would follow these three steps, it would make their life a lot easier and less painful altogether. These three steps are the three most important steps for everyone who wishes to have a successful relationship and a happy life.

 

Next Up, The Single Girl’s Guide To Surviving Valentine’s Day

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