Things You Can Do To Put The Spark Back In Your Relationship

Rediscover why you got together in the first place.


During the first few weeks and months of a relationship, it’s very easy to keep things interesting. That’s because your new partner and their habits are unfamiliar, and therefore a little bit unpredictable. But what happens when the novelty wears off?

If you’re stuck in a bit of a rut, and have dozens of other practical things to worry about, then it’s easy to let the relationship slip. But if you value one another’s company, then it’s worth taking the time to rekindle that elusive spark, and rediscover why you got together in the first place.

This can be done in several different ways.


Every time you touch another person, you get a hit of oxytocin – which is part of the reason that social distancing can be so mentally taxing. Take the time to hug, to cuddle, and to kiss – even if it’s just fleetingly. You might even consider investing in a loveseat to make physical intimacy that little bit easier to incorporate into life.


It shouldn’t be necessary to apologise instinctively without fully understanding what it is that you’ve done. If you’re doing that, then there’s probably a deeper underlying problem with the relationship that warrants exploration. But at the same time, we all occasionally do or say things we later regret, and expressing this regret can be important.

Learn to Lose

You don’t need to be on the winning side of every single argument. Often, the argument might not be exactly what you first think it’s about – so being prepared to concede points that might seem totally irrational might be a skill that you need to acquire.

Exercise Physically

As we grow older, our bodies deteriorate. Gravity takes its toll, and wrinkles multiply. This stuff will make you less physically attractive, almost by definition. If you want your significant other to look at you and think lustful thoughts, you should stay on top of exercise. Let’s face it, this is a large unspoken motivator for much of the fitness industry.

But perhaps as important as that is the effect that exercise has on your mood – it’ll give you that all-important pick-me-up, and make you more fun to be around. It’s also worth noting that, if you take the effort to look good, then your partner will feel valued. Conversely, if you let things slide, then then might feel like you’re taking them for granted.


Next upThe Sexual Standoff – How To Stop Fighting About Sex