The Art Of Active Listening

It’s easy to tell when someone is really listening to you, but are you actually a good listener? You’ve likely heard of active listening before; it’s a way of staying engaged during a conversation. But, did you know mastering it can make you a better support system for your loved ones and can even help you land a job?

The tricks most commonly associated with active listening are physical ones. While actively listening, nod while someone is talking to show that you are attentive. Smile when appropriate to encourage the other person to continue. Avoid movements that imply distraction like fidgeting or tapping your pen. Instead, maintain eye contact.

Beyond the physical, how you actually absorb the information is important. Often while listening, we’re preparing our response or applying judgment before the person who’s speaking has even completed their thought. Instead, ground yourself in the conversation, and maintain focus on the other person. Notice their body language, as it supplements what they’re saying. And, if you find yourself preparing a response, redirect your thoughts to what’s being communicated.

When it comes time to respond, strike a balance between honest and respectful. Asking questions shows that you’re processing the information, but be sure you don’t interrupt. Instead, wait until the end of a thought to ask questions. Reflecting on what the person has communicated by paraphrasing their words shows that you understand, and it welcomes them to add to what they’ve said. 

After some practice, this way of listening will be second nature. Until then, communication expert, Julian Treasure has an acronym to help. RASA stands for Receive, Appreciate, Summarize, and Ask. Remember this when talking with a friend, during a disagreement with your partner, or at a job interview, and see how being a better listener pays off.

Happy listening!