Can Sexting Boost Passion in Your Relationship? Quick Facts

If your relationship has hit a point where the passion is waning, that’s completely normal. It’s hard to sustain a long-term sex drive with another person, but it’s possible. And seeking a new relationship won’t solve the underlying problem, which is that passion is elusive.

But, don’t stress; instead, take action. You can boost passion in your relationship in many different ways, but one of the most overlooked is by incorporating sexting. If you haven’t considered it before, read on to find out why sexting boosts passion in a relationship.

Defining Passion

Passion means something different to everyone because it’s a subjective word. Merriam-Webster has a bunch of different definitions, one of the best being “intense, driving, or overmastering feeling or conviction,” but others including “ardent affection” and “sexual desire.” No matter which definition feels like what you want from your relationship, the underlying sentiment is the same: it’s intense.

Psychologists tend to define passion as a combination of emotion and motivation—and not always a desirable combination. The historical root of the word means to suffer. In a way, it makes sense. Passion causes you to obsess over something and to act in ways you normally would not.

Passion Is a Feeling

The truth is that passion is a feeling, and no emotion can last forever. Yet, never feeling passion is essentially a death sentence for your relationship. It’s essential to inject passion into your relationship from time to time, but not expect it to be a continuous state of being. One well-known psychologist puts it succinctly: how can we want what we already have?

How Sexting Can Help

What happens when passion leaves is your significant others begin to feel more like roommates. There is too much closeness, which is usually a good thing. But to make passion sustainable, you have to have enough distance and longing to make the sex interesting. As Jack Morin said, attraction plus obstacles equals excitement. So, if you want more passion in your relationship, you’re going to need more obstacles.

The thrill of the unknown is one of the fundamental joys of sex. At the beginning of a relationship, you aren’t sure if the other person is as into you as you are into them. Once that becomes known, you wonder what the sex will be like. Next is the question of whether this will be a regular occurrence or just a hot, one-night memory.

When you sext, you have a palpable distance between you and your partner. You want each other, but you can’t have each other in person right now. The situation is loaded with the desire that can bring back the intense feelings of when you were pursuing each other at the very beginning.

How to Get Started Sexting

The best time to get started sexting is when you won’t be seeing each other for a while. If the longest period away from each other is during the workday, use that. However, if you or your partner have an extended business trip coming up, that’s even better. The longer the absence, the more you can cultivate desire.

Next, ask your partner if it’s a good time for them to receive something NSFW. The content is totally up to you. You could describe a fantasy or send a racy picture—just do whatever feels most natural.

Steer clear of bringing up your typical sex routine. Why? It’s not that it’s not hot—it’s just that it’s a foregone conclusion. You already know what happens at the end. Talk about new ideas, things you want to do in the future. Novelty is always sexy.

Lastly, if you don’t have a sex partner or you’d like to get some practice in with a stranger, use the apps or websites that will protect your privacy and verify the ages of its users.