We Fuckin' On A Monday: 5 Ways To Get Freaky In Public & Nature Without Getting Arrested
A Summer Guide.
Last Monday we got into how to let someone know you are down and letting go of your fears. With Summer temperatures getting high, hemlines getting shorter and summer lust getting out of control; it is the perfect time to go out exploring in more ways than one.
We are here to help you out with our Top 5 Summer Guide to getting down and dirty in public.
Before you RSVP to the Public Pounding, here's a few tips for the virgins, cause we'd rather you cum than be a no show.
Tip #1: become a devout exhibitionist
Get it off and show it off. Not when you are grocery shopping obviously. But walk around your apartment naked, maybe escalate it a bit open your curtains a bit.
Tip #2: Practice before the big show
We don't mean practice fucking, we know you got that perfected down to the Big O, or two. We mean practice getting frisky in public. Start small: the department store change rooms, run your hands over your partners crotch while you are in the car, getting a little carried away at the movie theatre, public bathroom frisk or what about a little grab here and there in an empty elevator or a little under the table fun or why not bang it out on your own balcony. Sans audience or audience, what ever gets you off.
Tip #3: Get caught up in the moment but don't get caught
Let go! Don't stress it and have fun, and be safe too unless you want to tell your kids they were conceived in the forest on a Sunday walk. But make sure not to get caught at the Pound Party.
So now the tips are out of the way:
Top 5 Places To Get Freaky In Public
1. Side of the highway forest
On a long summer road trip and your horny metre just went crazy? Take a dirt road exit and drive a little in to the forest. Pull up close to some trees and well you know what to do. Try and do it standing up against a tree in a tree hugging doggie position to avoid twigs and branches getting in on the action.
2. Forest trail walk park bench
Surrounded by the wilderness, the cool shade of the trees. So romantic, so animalistic, so fuck on that bench right now! If you are feeling a little weirded out about it, a little under the skirt and zipper fun is also an option. Just remember play hard and get a wet.
3. In an alleyway
Make sure this one is a little later at night or you could find yourself in a lot of trouble.
4. In the Sea/Ocean
Sex on the beach is a great drink, but sand in your vagina, not so much. Get playing around in the water and go out just far enough to slide a bikini to the side and well honey if we told you this would be a porn novel not a sex column.
5. Hotel Window
Breasts pushed up against the glass. A whole city beneath you, that could be watching? Adding to the excitement. Higher the stakes better the orgasm.
Get freaky this week. But be safe.